Thoughts on Facebook

Dear Facebook,

You are a god. It must feel good to be you. Scratch that. It must feel GREAT to be you. Because, seriously, think about it, how many millions (billions?) of people are in love with you!? Seriously, so many of us are jealous of all the love you receive.

You are the new religion, binding us all together. Because of you, I can keep in touch with the friends and family that are oh, so far away. We can share pictures and connect/reconnect in almost any fashion we desire. Instead of calling Megan, to make a goofy comment on some picture she's recently been tagged in, I can just leave her a message for the entire world to see! It is as though you share your godly powers with me. And also her, because, you know, you've allowed that tagged picture to be seen by me and everyone else as well. Hell, in a lot of cases, people who may not even know her can see her! You are so awesome!

I remember this one time, I was mad at an old friend, but because of you, I was able to know everything she was up to, and had the ability to form a plan of attack. The feeling was indescribable. Of course, this has also been a tool used on me too. I mean, what goes around comes around, right? I deserved it when people spied on me and did hateful things. And that's only because I forgot I could set up my privacy settings. Boy I felt silly that day, I can tell you!

It is also because of you that I've witnessed people discover who their true friends are. Yes, that must make you feel all warm inside, knowing you can provide truths to people who reside in the dark. I know that sometimes, a comment might go un-deleted and the "wrong person" might see it. That's okay. Because of you, they don't even have to be pals anymore. And who would want to be friends anyway if so-and-so is going to say hateful things? So, friend A can delete friend B, and that should do the trick.

You're just so convenient. You're always the first to share with the world the scandals behind closed doors. You're the first to know about everything -- about break ups, (hey, sometimes even before the breakup-ee!), about farming, about birthdays, anniversaries, about, well, EVERYTHING! Sometimes you're even ahead the news -- while making the news, I might add.

Facebook, I am in awe of you. In awe of your grace, your ability to tell the truth, your almighty gift of connection. You are one of the only faiths left in this world.

I must admit that I for one, am in love with you. You are that extra mile of connective tissue that hold me together with those I love dear...and others admittedly, not so much, but we met that one time at some function, and now we can be friends -- all because of YOU.

Dearest Facebook, keep up the great work!